Over the years, I knew that I never did fit in any form. From trying to fit in with the crowds at school, work, friends, and etc, kind of sadening ain’t it? Oh well!
Growing up, I remember growing never fitting in anywhere, trying to go try out for sports, the school band, and school groups, all seem to be a bust. I did try to make friends even though some worked out compared to others. I never really had that many friends but since it was a small school, everyone seemed to know everyone and overall seemed to be alright with everyone getting along. Of course there seems to be a few blips of chaos or acting out that someone got into a bad fight or argument with one another person. I wasn’t exactly a loner or some shy and quiet person. Of course I knew what to avoid, how to defend myself and be sassy if I needed to be, and who my real friends were going to be since before high school. I was an extremely fast learner and knew how to read peoples personalities, mindset and mannerisms like you wouldn’t believe.
I also remember starting to liking the dark side of life since middle school. The dark side of life that I liked was the paranormal, oddities, sideshows, mediums, gothic history and fashion, and anything unusual. I guess my personality changed from that point in middle school. Of course a lot of things happened since then to now. Some loved ones past away, people coming and going, and other things that may be sensitive to talk about.
However I never did get into gothic fashion until recently. Darker colors seem to fit into what I may be. I am slowly switching over from colors to dark. I felt like gothic part was there for some quite time it’s just hasn’t shown into fashion yet until here recently. I was asked why am I dressing so dark and told that gothicism is gross. I told them have you ever sat down and had a descent conversation with me recently? Have you ever once tried to get to know me? How well do you actually know? Do you even know half the stuff I liked? Do you even know me? I’m not this shy, quiet loner girl as you or others make me out to be. Do YOU know me personally.
Yea of course I know that there’s stigmas against gothic community but you’ll have to get to know that person before you judge them. For example of stigmas one of my favorite YouTubers (@itsblackfriday) is a part of the gothic community which she faced stigmas and discrimination in Paris and Prague. Which it could’ve been handled differently.
So, if you’re a part of the gothic community, what do you think? Would I be considered a part of the community? I’m not sure if I’m considered a baby bat, teen, or elders even though the personality came before clothing? What are you thoughts?