Am I just a too Familiar Face?


Hello everybody,

I notice those who have been following me for a while and current followers, you may not know me. You’ve seen my journey’s, some up and downs and etc without knowing my looks or know me personally. For those who do actually know me in person, I never do mention this rarely at all.

Where do I begin?

Ever since I was a somewhat youngish kid, I always had a feeling like i was normal with a hence of “off-ness” which at the time, I didn’t know what the off-ness was exactly. Until, people started telling oh….you look like [name] from [location] (Doppelgängers). The locations can be localized, back where I grew up or even internationally. For the longest time, I never thought anything of it.

As years past, the more and more of Doppelgängers or thought or dreamt they saw me somewhere doing something at some point in time. Even some elders saying it to back before I were even born. You might think this is odd or extremely odd and probably some other things as well. Don’t worry, I thought of the exact same thing. I lost track of this at around 10-12 times. I typically brush it off my shoulders.

Although I do have one Facebook page about photography and for this blog that doesn’t have many follows but it’s nothing too famous or special, but that’s just my thoughts.

I’ll tell you about one of the recent situations that happened about a year ago when I was working at a fast-food restaurant. During one of the shifts, it was between the rush hours and I decided to grab a drink while I can. While I was filling up my cup, I noticed out of my peripherals, a table of 4 was giving me quite an odd/puzzling look. Once the cup got filled, I looked at the corners of my eyes towards the table to make sure I didn’t go crazy and turns out I was right. So, I turned their way and asked to see if there was something they needed and being professional about it. They said they didn’t need anything and asked to see what my name was and area I lived because that day I just happen to forget my name tag and I don’t go by full name (too popular and seems to fit me better). So, I told them my name and area I lived. Which it made them seem more puzzled. They realized I lived in a different state but worked in their state. We both apologized and what not and went on with the time. So, I drank my drink and went back to the kitchen. I could tell that they were puzzled still because I happened to peer through the window into the lobby. Oh, life’s a mystery ain’t it?

I also did see in media outlets that there was a man depicted in people’s dreams on multiple occasions. You can read about that mystery man here. Could this be happening to me? I have always wondered this? If you want me to upload a picture to this blog, let me know in the comments below.

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Lost Time Forgotten


 

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Picture taken by UnSilentTheSilence (2014)

It seems as time goes on we sometimes forget about what we leave behind. Somethings we remember as well as somethings well forgetful. How can that be?

Somethings we remember because it maybe traumatic that may affected so many lives. Examples of remembrance would be like some extreme acts of Mother Nature and wars9-11,  Berlin Wall, Pearl Harbor, Chernobyl and the Concentration Camps.

    Some things we tend to forget or leave behind. What about the abandoned land, property, businesses, homes, and other types of property and could it become in use? What about the events throughout history? What about the asylums? What about those who live in poverty? What about those who don’t have access to everyday needs? Did (insert event/promise/help/etc here) ever happen or is going to happen? It seems like we tend to forget those things that may have a dark history to it. A dark history when there was experimentations going on, maybe some inhuman things, or even the turn-of-the-century was changing.

The questions are:
How can we bring back what is forgotten?
Is the forgotten gone for a purpose or accidental reasoning?
Is the forgotten gone because we just “forgotten” about it?
How could we just “forget” what is just forgotten?
Could we have done things differently?
Should we just leave history be history?
Could we change the future history for the better?
And so many more to ask…………………………………………..

Self Acceptance, changes of myself


Over the years, I knew that I never did fit in any form. From trying to fit in with the crowds at school, work, friends, and etc, kind of sadening ain’t it? Oh well!

Growing up, I remember growing never fitting in anywhere, trying to go try out for sports, the school band, and school groups, all seem to be a bust. I did try to make friends even though some worked out compared to others. I never really had that many friends but since it was a small school, everyone seemed to know everyone and overall seemed to be alright with everyone getting along. Of course there seems to be a few blips of chaos or acting out that someone got into a bad fight or argument with one another person. I wasn’t exactly a loner or some shy and quiet person. Of course I knew what to avoid, how to defend myself and be sassy if I needed to be, and who my real friends were going to be since before high school. I was an extremely fast learner and knew how to read peoples personalities, mindset and mannerisms like you wouldn’t believe.

I also remember starting to liking the dark side of life since middle school. The dark side of life that I liked was the paranormal, oddities, sideshows, mediums, gothic history and fashion, and  anything unusual. I guess my personality changed from that point in middle school. Of course a lot of things happened since then to now. Some loved ones past away, people coming and going, and other things that may be sensitive to talk about.

However I never did get into gothic fashion until recently. Darker colors seem to fit into what I may be. I am slowly switching over from colors to dark. I felt like gothic part was there for some quite time it’s just hasn’t shown into fashion yet until here recently. I was asked why am I dressing so dark and told that gothicism is gross. I told them have you ever sat down and had a descent conversation with me recently? Have you ever once tried to get to know me? How well do you actually know? Do you even know half the stuff I liked? Do you even know me? I’m not this shy, quiet loner girl as you or others make me out to be. Do YOU know me personally.

Yea of course I know that there’s stigmas against gothic community but you’ll have to get to know that person before you judge them. For example of stigmas one of my favorite YouTubers (@itsblackfriday) is a part of the gothic community which she faced stigmas and discrimination in Paris and Prague. Which it could’ve been handled differently.

So, if you’re a part of the gothic community, what do you think? Would I be considered a part of the community? I’m not sure if I’m considered a baby bat, teen, or elders even though the personality came before clothing? What are you thoughts?